Feedback is a crisis.
For days, for years you’ve worked on something. You know what you’ve made.
And then you get notes. Suddenly you see your work through someone else’s eyes and it’s not what you thought you’d made at all.
It’s disorienting to say the least. And it’s often the moment we abandon our project — or maybe worse, ourselves.
So here’s what I want you to remember:
You are powerful. You are the creator of worlds — or at least the world of your work, which is the world in question right now. You are the one who will make every choice. You are the only one who CAN make the choices, because you are the only one who knows, truly knows, what your work is meant to be.
You need not surrender to the feedback. You need not defend against the feedback.
Instead, breathe. Spread all the feedback out on a table. Which bits resonates? Which bits are obviously projections that have nothing to do with your work? (Pro tip: a lot of the feedback we receive about our work is projection that has little to nothing to do with our work!)
Most of all ask: WHICH BITS MAKE YOU FEEL GOOD? Not because they’re a compliment necessarily, but because on some level you feel them to be true.
Trust yourself: if something is ACCURATE, whether or not it is complimentary, it will feel good. If something is INACCURATE, whether or not it is complimentary, it will leave you feeling confused, empty, deflated.
So keep what feels good. Push aside what does not.
Allow yourself to be powerful, and from that place of power, invite the accurate feedback to serve you.